Remus Lupin Monologue
by PadfootRawr
Summary: This was written before Deathly Hallows so no spoilers.


By the way this was written** before** Deathly Hallows. So no Spoilers, and events from the book haven't been included :) (That's why i haven't added Tonks or Teddy : )

* * *

**Reflecting back I always wonder what happened. **

We used to be perfect. Just the four of us, and we even grew to a group of five, and then finally we reached the mark of six. But that only lasted a short while, which I should have cherished.

When I went to Hogwarts, I was finally accepted for being who I was. Not just Remus Lupin, not just an ordinary wizard, because I was far from it, but for being part werewolf. Firstly it was Albus Dumbledore who accepted me warmly, he saw past the werewolf. He saw me as the boy I was, as a quite intelligent young child, who could probably strive far; although I knew not many people opened up to werewolves. When I'd been bitten, I'd told myself that the dreams of going to Hogwarts were flattened and it was impossible. But that was before I met Albus. He welcomed me there with open arms, and the heart that nearly everyone grew to love.

Secondly there was James and Sirius. And I suppose you could say Peter, although I don't know what to think of him anymore. I'd hidden my condition quite well, although the excuses were getting rather slim, and I often repeated them. I knew they could see through the lies, but I continued my dishonesty until they confronted me. I admitted my condition, and hung my head low, waiting for either the outburst or the swishing of cloaks, signalling their departure. When I heard nothing, I looked up curiously, and saw them all staring at me intently. And they told me it didn't bother them. At first I thought they were lying, so they wouldn't hurt my feelings, but when they smiled reassuringly, and acted no different I believed them. I always remember that moment; it was one of the happiest days of my life, since I was finally accepted for who I was.

Although I think of Peter from time to time, once a marauder, but he doesn't deserve to be known by that. Or that he had been with us. Sometimes I think back to our school years, when we were young and carefree. I was usually reading, or keeping Padfoot and Prongs in order, Padfoot was usually looking for trouble, or impressing the girls, Prongs was usually admiring the golden snitch, trying to get a moment with Lily or also joining Sirius in an adventure. But then there was Peter. I often ponder about him, whether he truly was our friend in those Hogwarts years. Or if he just tagged along to be popular from James and Sirius, get help on his work from me, or that he had no other friends. He admired all of us, and looked up to us. He told me so, unless that to was another lie. But he is a traitor now, and he betrayed all of us.

Then there was Lily. She was beautiful, and she could always comfort someone or calm them down. And as soon as she finally agreed to go out with James, she had made him the happiest guy alive. We knew they were perfect for each other. But she also accepted me for who I was. I didn't want her to know, but Sirius and James insisted, and finally told her. But she was like the rest; she took it aboard without a care in the world. And she was always there if you needed a talk, but her feisty nature was still intact, the one that she had never grown out of. If she had her mind set on something, she was determined and would constantly achieve it. That was one of the things that made her a lot like Prongs; Loyal, determined and kind-hearted. And when they were both killed by Voldemort, we all missed it. But their loyalty and determination showed in the end. James had sacrificed his life to give Lily a chance to escape with Harry. Lily too gave her life, and created the blood bond which saved their son that fateful night.

Which also brings me onto Harry; the brave, daring and affectionate boy that has strived so far for others, and although Lily and James are gone, they shine through him. And I even see a small part of Sirius coming through him. I see that on a regular basis. He is always loyal to Ron and Hermione, as James and Sirius were to me. And I have noted to myself, that if he gets an idea in his head, it's unlikely you will erase it from his mind without a fight. He is strong in a physical sense which was inherited from James, but also emotionally and mentally steady like Sirius was; and also which kept him sane in Azkaban. But also if you get on the wrong side of him, Lily's redheaded feisty attitude appears, but he can calm down effortlessly, and replace the scowl with a smile quicker then you could say 'quidditch'.

He also accepted me for who I was, I thought he may not, but he reminds me so much of his father as he calls my werewolf state my 'furry little problem' as did James. And I was pleased he didn't think any less of me, because of my condition; although I didn't think he would, as he is too much like James, Sirius and Lily to hold something like that against me.

He has lost many, but he's still walking forward, trying to save the future from Voldemort's wrath. When I watch him, I often find a smile placing itself on my lips, as he always brings back remembrances of my old friends. And the good memories as well as the bad, but they are all worth thinking about. He's been described as 'The-Boy-Who-Lived' and 'The Chosen One' but everyone in the wizarding world knew who he was before he did himself. And I wish I could do anything to change his life, but it's no longer in my hands. He lost his parents, got put with the Dursleys, lost Sirius, and finally lost Dumbledore. Although I know I am not that good a wizard, I have sworn to myself that I will protect him as best I can. And I will fight by his side when the final battle comes. Not just for Harry, but for Sirius, James and Lily.

**_Because I am the last marauder and Harry is all I have left._**


End file.
